Oh The Irony: I Called A Psychic!

 

Today I called Lady Sarah of:  http://soulmatereading.com/ to ask her about the ignoring.  This is a hard topic for me because Joron is silent again.  He came through with a big dose of love and then is gone again.  It is difficult.  Holding on to belief is a challenge... especially when I am constantly tested by those around me.

My family thinks I am crazy.  My younger sister lives with me and it's a struggle because she sees my battle for balance and feels I am pathetically, desperately, pathologically in love with Joron.  They all think I am wasting my life, trying too hard, not living.  She and I had a huge HUGE fight this morning.  She told me some very mean things including the fact that since my twin is an Atheist and I am a full-blown "channeling" believer that he will not and could not ever love me.  She said I am the reason why no one stays in love with me, why my husbands stopped loving me.  She said I am the reason why Joron pulled away, because I chased him away with my weirdness.  I just love how spirit uses her as a vessel to test me and my fortitude!  She said Joron can't love me.

But he just told me he loves me.  I heard him.  This was... oh, nine days ago.  Then last week we emailed about coming back.  He said while he's not expecting anything from me he thinks about being intimate with me, and he called me "honey" and wrote "I love you."  But everyone around me tells me I am living with my head in the clouds.  They think I am sick.  They don't understand me and never truly have.  I scare them a bit.  I once mentioned that I am being put through healing due to my childhood and I think that hit my mom super hard but I didn't mean it to upset her.

It's truth.  I uncontrollably urinated in my pants from fear-reaction until I was in my twenties... and it was because of my mother's violence towards me.  I can't fake that.  It happened.  I don't hold it against her but the abuse didn't just fucking disappear; I'm going through an entirely difficult spiritual healing process so I can be whole, and Joron is helping me but of course all they see is he hasn't come back for me.

So anywho- bad bad morning.  I was feeling entirely down so I called Lady Sarah, prompted by this article: http://soulmatereading.com/tag/soulmate-limbo/     and I asked her to please PLEASE tell me the "ignoring" is really through soul and not ego-based choice.  That what I am experiencing is real- that his soul is working to help heal me and this makes him he go quiet.  I told her I really need to know.  She said YES it is fully true and she gets calls like mine a few times a week.  She said I am in a perfectly typical soul mate or twin soul union {and I could care less what he is as long as he loves me} and it is to heal.  The struggle is the healing and the reward is the end relationship {just like The Goddess Psyche as she goes through her hero's journey.}

She said he thinks about me every day, and he told me this before, that not a day goes by that he doesn't think of me.  She said he talks to me in his head.  He feels we will be together in the future although he's confused right now because he's being worked so strongly by soul and trying to figure it all out himself.  She reaffirmed to me that "manifestation" is simply SOUL.  So when I did my manifestation ritual that asked for my "one and only soul mate" my soul said to Joron's soul... okay get ready.  Come this one's fortieth birthday she's going to get the gift of a lifetime!!!  And BAM I met my twin soul, my Beloved.  My helpmate.  My *friend.*  My dear dear friend.  Oh how I love my friend.  Soul is in charge of it all.  We ask in faith and soul grants it to us.  When we believe and listen then soul shows us the way.  This video right here, "Magic," is totally a message from soul!!  Listen to the words... "You have to believe we are magic."  WE- like "we", the 3D physical us and soul, are a team.  Exactly. 

She also told me the testing gets stronger.  Yippee.  I'm going to have to be strong.  I'm sure my sister is a challenge for me, to test me.  I am not going to cave to thinking he's using me or manipulating me though.  I'm just not.  Maybe I am beyond where I need to call a psychic but Hell- I'm not perfect!!!  It was fifteen minutes, she confirmed my beliefs, and I feel calm and ready to plug along. 

   

    Magic