Take What Resonates And Leave The Rest Behind

That's fact to me.  He is my one in six billion, well 4.5 billion as he says.  That is fact, for me.  And since I don't like to tempt fate, and since I know what happens to ME when I fear or doubt, I try not to say much beyond "I have faith he is my destiny."  My twin soul himself said he held out so I could be born before him, his destiny.  I can't let that go.

But... I am also not stupid or disillusioned.  Right now it feels like I could never love another.  I feel like this:

I feel like I just cannot let him go.  I've never felt this way before.  It is new to me, and it can be a little scary because it is out of my control.  I met someone nice this past October and was tempted to for out on a date, out for dinner, but my stomach was a ball of knots and I had anxiety.  That was a reaction beyond my control.  I couldn't do it.

That said, if Joron is not my one and only then God will bring me another just as wonderful as he, someone else who loves like I do.  I know this.  For the time being though I am meant to believe that Joron is IT.  This special soulmate who entered my life in order to love me, leave me and help change me.  And I am meant to love him all through this.  It's what I am told from above and it is what I feel in my heart.

Love.  Always love.

Does this mean I know for sure we will reunite?  No.  I don't.  I can only hope, pray, and have faith.  I can try to listen to my guidance and look forward to when I can see his smiling face again.  I'd do pretty much anything for a hug.  I love him like I've never loved another man in my life.

I think there are others out there who are going through something similar but they don't realize it.  This is why I share.  I think there are people out there who don't really understand the mirroring.  They feel it's an ego-based choice when I have been shown very clearly that soul is working through my Joron whether he wants it or not, and I know that goes against our human idea of Free Will.  I can't explain it.  I only know what I see.  I see that this man always said "Friends forever!" but he absolutely will not respond to me unless he is supposed to.  Unless there is some divine reason for doing so, like I've finally managed to shift my energy and he matches me at that vibration.   I have no doubts about this.  I SEE it and it's been one of the hardest challenges in my life to actually believe and accept because, come on, who is REALLY "controlled" by soul?  It makes no sense, right?  Well in my life I see it, and I don't love it.  I want back what we had before.  The all-day texting and emails.  The phone calls that lasted hours. The endless make out sessions.  The closeness.  The nose-nuzzling.  The lovemaking.  The laughter.  The smiles.  The hugs.  All that ended for no reason other than Higher Self said "Okay the time is NOW- time to go silent!" and *poof* the man I knew changed on me.  It's been very hard to swallow.  Very.  At the same time *I* am the one experiencing it, not you.  I don't expect you to believe all of it. Just know having an intense loving romantic relationship between two people who have strongly bonded END for no "real" reason can be very traumatizing.

And that ain't no joke. 

But- I want to make sure people who read my blog understand something.  Always take what I write, and what anyone else says for that matter, with a grain of salt.  Only own what resonates with you because my path is different that others.  My advice of the day might not work for you.  The advice of others does not always resonate with me.  I don't agree with everything Mel says or what others write while sometimes I read something and it is EXACTLY the same as what I experience and that is reaffirming.  I spoke with Mel and he was SO sweet but not everything he said felt like it resonated with me.  I have to decide what works for me and leave the rest behind.  The same will happen for you.  I write here because it helps ease my soul and also because I want to share what I experience.  My experiences, for me, are fact.  They are my TRUTH.  What I experience is not my opinion but plenty of other things I think are my opinion.  The mirroring, though, is not one of them.  The fact that I can go without hearing from Joron for weeks but then I have a moment where I am hating and drunk and screaming resentful at God and Higher Self and Joron, and I'm wanting to go out and be stupid and have cheap empty hurtful sex and just be overall self-destructive {after being warned to watch my energy because I create my existence} and RIGHT THEN at the pinnacle of my ego-fit he will reach out to me and his words will be harsh and cold and 100% reflective of how shitty I feel- that is not coincidence.  It is not assumption.  It is not opinion.  It is not me trying to convince myself that he's a good guy just to soothe my ego.  It is plain ole' spooky mirroring.  It is my truth and I share it just in case someone out there is going through something similar.

But when I write- I do so from the angle of take what resonates with you and LEAVE the rest behind.  You can disagree with me as much as you'd like.  You won't change my truth but that does not mean my truth works for you.  Just that I am sharing my truth will all of you.

I had to write this because lately some of the things I read and have been told about twin souls has confused me and sent me into a tail spin, and it is never my intent to send anyone else of spinning!  One channeler writes that to help get closer to reunion we should write about our beloveds three times a day, with love, all the loving attributes they possess; this will help the energy.  But that same channeler later wrote that we are supposed to "forget" our twin souls in order to reunite, that they must become "irrelevant" to us.  Forgotten.  How can I write about my Joron and forget him at the same time?  And honest to God you'd have to kill me in order to get me to forget him.  It would be like trying to forget my own child, and that is an impossibility.  I was so frightened for a few hours contemplating this until finally I realized: I must take what resonates with me and leave the rest behind.  "Forgetting" does not resonate with me.  It just makes me very sad.  That is some advice I will gladly leave behind.  

I have my opinions.  I think we are meant to be loving and kind and ultra forgiving.  Beyond that all I know comes from my experiences.  I don't claim to be an expert like Mel or Lee.  I offer no services to anyone besides the words I share freely here, and I share them with best wishes for all to be happy and healthy but I will always feel we are meant to take what works for us, what resonates, and let the rest go.

In peace,

Rose